I had been put through Litmus test, literally.
I was blamed, mentally tortured...and abused...by all and None! Had a weird feeling of a fight between me and myself..trying hard to keep calm and yet keep the boiling point, "Inflamed". Had all that was needed to blast and show my outburst...
For a time, I had someone to keep me calm..for a moment, I felt someone with me, all the way, along...I was prepared to be ready for anything that matters..or doesn't matter...Whatsoever!
I tried to recollect and also collect someone..shattered with me...and yes I did. I did to best of me. But seems...somehow, it wasn't enough. Not enough from my end...but not enough to pacify and clear the doubts...clear the fear...clear the uncertainty....
I failed! I failed big time...not because I didn't try...
I failed! I failed not because efforts were not enough....
I failed because it was destined to...and you know why?
Failure wasn't on me...it happened because for the very reason, I was trying hard...going through all the pain and seeing me, shattered...maligned and distrusted....THAT distrust had a "LIE" underneath...Lie, which I never did...which I never said...which I never practiced...yet, to my strangest disbelief, I was labeled as LIAR!!!!
I am loosing my hopes...I am loosing my strength...I am loosing my faith.
Someone, who used to be my biggest strength, has now weakened me....weakened me as never before.
I feel Dead.
Inside.
I was blamed, mentally tortured...and abused...by all and None! Had a weird feeling of a fight between me and myself..trying hard to keep calm and yet keep the boiling point, "Inflamed". Had all that was needed to blast and show my outburst...
For a time, I had someone to keep me calm..for a moment, I felt someone with me, all the way, along...I was prepared to be ready for anything that matters..or doesn't matter...Whatsoever!
I tried to recollect and also collect someone..shattered with me...and yes I did. I did to best of me. But seems...somehow, it wasn't enough. Not enough from my end...but not enough to pacify and clear the doubts...clear the fear...clear the uncertainty....
I failed! I failed big time...not because I didn't try...
I failed! I failed not because efforts were not enough....
I failed because it was destined to...and you know why?
Failure wasn't on me...it happened because for the very reason, I was trying hard...going through all the pain and seeing me, shattered...maligned and distrusted....THAT distrust had a "LIE" underneath...Lie, which I never did...which I never said...which I never practiced...yet, to my strangest disbelief, I was labeled as LIAR!!!!
I am loosing my hopes...I am loosing my strength...I am loosing my faith.
Someone, who used to be my biggest strength, has now weakened me....weakened me as never before.
I feel Dead.
Inside.

lovely lines,,,cuming from sumwhere deep inside u,,and few last ones, reveal the real u..the emptiness created in u by sumone, which even tried hard, can't probably be ever fulfilled...
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